Tent camping with my family for seven days, gave me the opportunity to learn ALOT of things about them….things that I really could have gone my whole life not knowing, and felt just fine about it.
For starters, this family ain't right. We amuse ourselves, by poking fun at each other, and then at the strangers around us…and LOUDLY! That's why it isn't surprising that we never kept a neighbor at our campsite, for more than one night!
We sat around the campfire talking every morning, every night, and then most of the day. We reminisced about old times and caught up on new things in life. We talked about food, relationships, the difference in the appropriateness of wearing a brazier outside vs. a bikini top…….poop, politics, getting abducted by aliens, bears, ticks, double dragonflies……. how much people in our party hate to fish, cook out doors, and camp…perineums, and anti aging male enhancement pills…. Yes! Anti aging male enhancement pills, which we will call… AAMEP's:)
I will preempt this conversation by saying that sometimes children can be a nuisance, especially when you've made one of them angry, and when they retaliate, by sharing all of your deepest darkest secrets. This is what happened to my poor brother In law, after he had pestered his son too much, on this particular morning. His son went on a tangent, barely taking a breath, telling the whole group about his dads AAMEP usage. He continued on, saying the pills have been recalled by the government, but his dad still takes them, and assured us that he would probably die one day from this rat poisoning.
HAHAHAHA….. None of us could stop laughing at this newfound news. My brother in law believed he had cleared this up, by saying he doesn't really take them anymore, and he only took them as an energy booster to begin with. I had never heard of this, and I wondered if ALOT of people take this supplement when they're tired….
Unfortunately, this story will never leave him, as long as he lives! In addition, Renee will never stop being made fun of for her TRUE recollections of her alien abduction story, when she went missing for approximately 30 minutes, and my mom and chuck will never get rid of the story, of the time they got “stuck together”, in a small bathroom space, and had to cry out for assistance. These stories may seem alarming, but amuse us just the same:).
We are what you call a traditional “mixed” family. Step parents, step kids, step siblings, nieces, nephews, and grand kids. It doesn't matter what the terminology is, because we all consider ourselves “JUST FAMILY”. Usually, there is no sibling rivalry, and we generally get along well. However, it is only natural that we would want to have bigger and better equipment than the next person… Bigger tents, bigger air mattresses, the best camp chairs and grills…..
Most of the time I had NO ENVY for other people's things. That is, until I looked in my sisters tent, and saw her mattress. It was waist high, and at first I thought it had to be a water bed:). It was AMAZING, to say the least. I took my shoes off, as demanded, so I could try this bed out, if only for a moment, before her husband told me to “GET OUT”!
It became a joke, because every time they left the campsite, their tent door was left open, and their bed was left a mess. Once, they found a pink pair of panties on the floor, which were obviously left by one of our little cherubs. However, they were certain that I was the one who kept sneaking in, while they were gone….and I never said I wasn't:)…..But on one occasion, when they were gone, and after I had ingested several beers, I got a great idea…..
I pulled my shirt up, to show my midriff. I wrapped a beach towel around my waist, to give the appearance of nudity. I got a pair of my own mint condition, pink granny panties, and delicately placed them on their luxurious mattress. I giggled the whole time at my own self, and then had a good look of surprise, as my brother and nephew snapped photos of the placement process, to reminisce about later.
We all waited patiently for them to be found, but what happened surprised us all, and led to a better result than planned! My brother in law…the same one who frequently uses the AAMEP'S, had been the one to find them. Instead of shouting, he made his bed nicely, moving the underwear to a questionable place, at the time, and then said he was headed to the showers!!!???? We laughed ourselves to near asphyxiation!
He just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time…. When I went on a search for the panties, I told everyone I had found them under his pillow, but really…..he was innocent. He had thought they were his wife's, and had placed them in her bag, like a good husband on AAMEP'S.
We saw no bears or moose on this trip. We saw one deer, two chipmunks, several ticks, and three dead porcupines. We never met the goal of seeing real wildlife, but we sure did have great adventures. So, Im going to say this yet another time…. I LOVE MY FAMILY:).
FINAL CAMPING STATUS: NOT EATEN BY A BEAR!!!!