family, funny, humor, humour, kids, mom humor, parenting, running

RED ROVER:The Game That No One Wins!!

RED ROVER RED ROVER SEND GRANDMA RIGHT OVER…..

This is how my Friday night got started. Sometimes my family and I make choices that seem good and fun in the get go, but then many times the chioce turns into a catastrophe, and often has the potential of broken bones.

My mom was the first to agree to play Red Rover, at the kids request! She then lured a handful more of us….ADULTS….into the game, claiming it would be full of adventure…AND She NEVER disappoints!:)

Sadly, all of the children in this family learn early on, that each and every one of us wants to win. We will stop at nothing to get our desired result…. trampling children doesn't deter us at all. By learning this so early, they have also developed this same drive.

Each adult sprinted as fast as possibe, using all the upper body strength we had, to rip through the the arms of our weakest link….our precious cherubs. They stood strong, bracing themselves, their faces all askew….AND refused to let go of the next persons arm, NO MATTER WHAT…..making for great laughs and several brushes with death.

CHILDREN WERE FLYING EVERYWHERE! Since they were holding on for dear life, refusing to break the link, this always resulted in their bodies flying in the air…..and then….as the adult body kept going anyway, their little bodies would loop around the runners body, until their nightmare would finally end, and someone would give up! Because the adults refused to be made fools of, we would keep our fast paces up, running people into corn fields, boats, and brush piles…to finally get them to break the link…..which rarely happened.

Some kids claimed they were clothes lined and others took breaks to dry up their tears, and massage their metatarsals, while assessing to see if there were any bone chips swimming around their wrists……. But the game went on.

We pinched, tickled, and grunted to break the link. We taunted each other and preyed on each others weaknesses… We heckled each other, and laughed like witches, when we would trap our next victim! One older female patron of the group, whom I will not name, urinated several times on herself, both during the run part and during the “not breaking of the link” part, due to her weaknesses, and the fact that her concentration was directed more at holding in her pelvic floor, than breaking the link!…..But the game went on.

We played for a good SOLID 20 minutes, and sadly no one won any big prizes. What we did win was bruised arms, legs, and ribs, bruised egos, and bruised spirits. We won scrapes, scratches, torn ligaments and groins, and soiled undergarments.

That's what's so wonderful about this family. EVERYONE IS ALWAYS THE WINNER.:).

 

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