Do you ever become so focused on one thing, that you are willing to let everything fall behind, just so you can tend to it? Do you hurry to finish your mundane tasks, so you can promptly return to the more desired, important task? Do you become so consumed that it borders on the line of obsession?….
Sadly, this happens to me every time I find a new fascination….
Several years back, this happened when I got my first guitar….and then again when I got my second electric guitar, with the amplifier, that I insisted on purchasing, that also had a short in it. I played with that thing constantly, forgetting the world around me, until my fingers bled, causing me to have to take a break. I'd fight through the long pauses of the electrical short, just holding the note longer, to prove that I made a reasonabe purchase. I threw tantrums when I couldnt figure it out, would blame others for messing me up, and would constantly say “Can you tell what song Im playing…can you”?
Of course, at the time, no one would be able to guess the song, but everyone would feign knowing it by saying “It sounds familiar, but I cant place it”, because they couldnt endure my derogatory response if they couldnt guess. The problem is, I can never just ease into something…I have to know AND buy EVERYTHING!
Almost a year ago, I became overly obsessed with this blog. I had no idea what a blog was, but after a friend suggested I try to write to a broader viewing area, I became intrigued. I began to research for weeks, before starting that first page. I didnt know how to do any of that “advanced technology” sort of thing, so I needed to learn. Sometimes, I would fill whole days trying to learn to do one task, by watching self help videos, and videos of geniuses taking me through it step by step. I often felt that I was being interrupted, by having to pick the kids up from school or make them dinner…..Or heaven forbid they ask me a question! When I couldn't figure something out, or messed something up, I would yell out in angst, and through gritted teeth saying “THIS MAKES ME SO MAD”!
EVENTUALLY, when I figure out the basics, enough to appease myself, I will calm down and reintegrate myself into the world again, balancing my hobbies like a normal person. However, this just sets me up for new obsessions, when something catches my eye.
Recently….this happened again. I found myself highly intrigued by a fancy banjo I came across, and I havent stopped thinking of it since. I became determined to play this thing, even if it took my whole life (and Im hopeful that it wont take this long, to save myself a divorce and loss of custody). 🙂
Heres where it starts…..
Once the banjo was in my hand, I started piddling with it immediately. I hushed the kids so I could hear the country crooner describe, via video, how to tune it, how to play a note, then a chord, and then a song. I read and researched how to set the insrument up, what to look for, and payed attention to the important things, that I may need to note on the device. The first whole day, I played the thing completely out of tune, until I could figure out how to do it on my own.
I do pity the poor people that have to surround themselves with me during these times, because I become way more obnoxious than my regular baseline level. What happens next is, I eventually think I have absorbed everything I think I need to know, then I move on to the professionals. It becomes time for me to seek help in my advancement. This week, I took the banjo to the music store, prepared to buy up the store if necessary. I NEVER enter a place like this, without being prepared with a bit of knowledge, which is perhaps, one of the most annoying qualities about myself. Even knowing this, I cant seem to stop my educated mind, and my overexcited mouth from running…eventually scaring and/or annoying the help!
I made my way into that store like a cougar ready to pounce. I talked about fret boards, new strings, tuners, pics, and music. I asked questions that I already knew the answers to, for no other reason but to correct them if they were mistaken. I offered up my past credentials in the music business, and
annoyed astounded them with my knowledge. I could NOT stop talking!!!
I bought finger pics, 2 books, new strings, and left the banjo there to be maintained. As I left that store, I was both excited, and feeling a bit of separation anxiety, since I hadnt yet mastereed my trade! I only had to go without it for one day, but I had to interrupt our “date night”, to go pick up my precious piece.
Already, I have learned two songs, that apparently only I can hear?! Maybe because I have the ear of a banjoist, and maybe because theyre not musically inclined, like myself. However, the biggest problem in the last week, has been to balance my life, with my running, banjo playing, guitar playing, and my writing. Im having to cut out such things as naps and lunch, but Im slowly getting there.
Please be patient as I adjust to my new lifestyle change/obsession, and I thank you in advance!! 🙂