funny, humor, humour, kids, mom humor, nurses, parenting, society, travel

The Disease of Being Busy…

“Being busy does not always mean real work. The object of all work is production or accomplishment and to either of these ends there must be forethought, system, planning, intelligence and honest purpose, as well as perspiration.” Thomas Edison

Like the majority of people, I am busy. I have 4 busy children, a house that needs tended to, and I have a full time job. I have to fit in orthodontist appointments, teacher meetings, sporting events, dinner plans, and somehow have to manage to keep my own appointments in the process. The concept alone is exhausting.

“Life is short”, we all say. We have to fit in as much as possible, and stay as busy as we can, while we can…right?

The thought process of that statement is genious. It seems to make perfect sense! That is, until something happens that proves you are a complete idiot.

Recently, I have been so busy and tired that Ive begun to whine about it publicly, irritating my own self in the process….. BUT this month, in addition to all of the busyness of my various undertakings, this was happening….

Starting about a month ago, I began to notice a small leak in my back tire. At this point, I would spend the $1.00 to fill it with air, in hopes that the temperature was to blame for the deflation, instead of the 100,000 miles that had been placed on it.

4 days later, I would spend it again….

Losing track of days and money, I would randomly fill this tire with air again and again, between toting my children to their desired places, taking my pets for their vaccinations, and grocery shopping for the umpteenth time. I would get to that tire when I stopped being so busy.

During a 3 day stint at work, after having to start the process of filling the tire daily, the reality began to hit me that the dangers of this tire may have started to outweight the importance of my busy IMPORTANT tasks.

I was running late to work on the third day…as usual. This time, I not only noticed the tire light on again, but also my gas light. Being to busy to stop, I went ahead to work.

After saving lives all day, I walked out of the hospital tired and aching…longing for that well needed glass of wine, and a foot rub that was unlikely. I knew I should have stopped at the gas station then, but I was just too tired. I decided to chance it, and try to make it to the station closer to home.

Half way home, I began to worry. I sent a quick text to my loving companion, to notify her that she may have to come fetch the pizza I had bought for dinner, on the side of the highway. I also asked that in case that were to happen, that she please bring a tire iron and a few gallons of gas.

Luckily, I found my way to the exit, riding out the last of the trip on only a rim and fumes. After rocking my body back and forth quickly, in a head banging sort of fashion, I eked my way directly in front of the pump. I then scoured my car for any remaining change, and went in with nickles and pennies, to ask for 4 quarters to fill my tire with air.

The gentleman inside smiled and said “Ma’am, this is kind of a fancy air pump, are you sure you know how to use it”?

Irritated, I scoffed at him. Having used every air pump in Indiana in the last month, I said “Sir, I have used half of my salary the last month on AIR, that we breathe for free. I could have bought 4 tires by now! I think Ive got it”! Geez, couldnt he tell I was BUSY!!?

Still, another week and a half came and went, and I was just as busy as ever! In addition to my regular chores, I had wine trip to get to, and a country concert…oh and dont forget about the poolside lounging, and the multitude of naps I needed to energize myself, before and after my “real” task oriented projects…like piddling…

I headed to work yet again, and this time I had to stay late. I wouldnt get home until midnight, and I had to be back at work at 7am the next morning. Again, my tire light was on before I left that morning…. I didnt even check it. Instead, I parked the car, and went into work, knowing that at midnight tonight that tire would have taken its last flat.

As though the tire could read my own mind, I came out to find that it sat nicely on its rim. I should have changed the tire at this point, to at least the spare, but I didnt have time to deal with this.

So instead, I naturally drove my car to the nearest gas station. Not knowing where that was, I relied on the GPS, which took me to one of the top five places in the city to get yourself shot! I was too scared to put the fix a flat in, because I didnt have time for my flesh to burn off my bones…and because I had trouble finding anyone who spoke english and/or anyone who wasnt at risk to show their underwear further, if bending over…So I did what any other foolish woman would do….

I filled that tire with an unknown amount of air, and drove it home with the hopes it wouldnt blow out on the highway. As luck would have it, I made it safely…

Today, 3 of my 4 tires are new.

Sometimes our “busy work” is an excuse to ignore more important things. I find myself saying “I dont have time”, more times than not. The true reality is….We have the time for what we think is important.

Life is short…We SHOULD fill it with what is important!…..But do yourself a favor and stop and check every now and then, just to remind yourself what is REALLY important!

Safe travels my friends….

 

 

 

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Holding Tight to the Old, but Embracing the New…

Bright lights, inflatable yard decor, and fancy wreaths on the door….

Broadway shows, bell choirs, christmas movies, and more….

Before the turkey has even been given a chance to digest, our anticipation for the Christmas Holiday begins.

However, unlike the traditions of my own youth… and even further from the traditions of my parents/grandparents youth, our focus has changed. Its about “keeping up with the Jones's”, so to speak. Do we have the newest and best chaser lights? Do we have the fanciest tree? Have we stood in long lines to assure our precious children have the latest electronics? Have we attended the best shows of the season? Does our family Christmas photo card put others to shame?

….And most importantly, is it possible to find a bigger Santa Clause than the 30 foot inflatable one next door?

While I too, am slowly finding myself transitioning into the new trend, I still try to hold tight to the old ones. The only problem is that the same little people that Im trying to leave a lasting impression on, are the same little people that are fighting my nostalgia!!

This season, I've found myself frustrated with the eye rolls, while I dance festively around the kitchen singing “Rockin around the Christmas tree”… URGING them to swing their backsides to the beat along with me. My patience is being tested further, after having to shoo them out of their rooms, and remove the electronics that they seem to have physically glued to their fingertips…just so I wouldnt take them. I begged for them to bake cookies with me, wrap presents with me, sing with me, color with me…..Just show some sign that they recognized that I was there!!!

As usual, after constantly pestering, whining…and then finally bribing them, I did acquire the attention I desired. It cost me a mere 45 dollars in repayment the next day, as we all settled in with the largest buckets of popcorn to watch the new version, of the old movie Annie! I tried to pay them back by rolling my eyes a little, pretending that I would rather be sitting around the Christmas tree, singing carols and crocheting popcorn decorations to put on our live tree… but they saw right through me.

After I sang my way through the parts I remembered, cryed through the Jamie Foxx lyrics that cut to the core, and crammed popcorn down my throat, until it began to come back up…. I looked down at my kids and smiled. It wasnt such a bad tradition was it? Are these the moments that they will try to impress upon their own children?

I began to see things through their eyes for a minute, and started to reflect on my own selfish, new age desires, that stretched beyond singing Christmas carols at the old folks home. Wasn't it just a week ago that I finally fulfilled my life long dream of seeing the Trans Siberian Orchestra?

It seems like I spent my whole early adult life dreaming of what it would be like to attend such a show! I pictured a giant CLASSY orchestra, with eclectic head banging, electric guitar players strumming alongside. The pyrotechnics would be uncomparable, and the the music would be a step above the boring old orchestras that I had pictured thus far! In those days…it was only a dream…

This year, I had a chance to “keep up with the Jones's AND the Smithes's. Finally, I had worked hard enough to earn the money to put myself amongst this class of people.

With a black cocktail dress, sheer leggings, red high heels, red lips, Sildapia earrings, my good GUESS coat, that I got on clearance a few years back, and with a new date on my arm, my dream had finally arrived…..

Except…it wasn't as I had always pictured!…

I was drinking wine out of a fancy plastic cup as we settled into our perfect seats, and I realized that I may have been overdressed….

I watched in silence as I watched the Nelson brothers…the same twin brothers that I loved in the nineties…swing their hair, and jam their guitars, back to back, to the sweetest, cutest Christmas songs.

I watched as the ladies from HOOTERS tried their best to remember the choreography that they waited a lifetime to perform.

I watched the people in the front few rows, as they tried to head bang, but also tried to sway their heads and light their lighters…confused, but yet somehow enlightened, by what was happening…..

…and then I giggled! Was this for real?!

While it wasn't what I had expected, it was a perfect night! It was still great music, I had the best, fun loving companion, and I still got to dress up!! I had fulfilled a dream, and yet had adamently decided not to start a new tradition of watching this show!

I looked over at my children again, and realized how much they make me think. Traditions will stay traditions as long as someone has the desire to carry them on. I too, moved on from my own parents traditions. I kept the ones I liked, and dreamed for new ones to come.

As each new person enters into our lives…as each new technology is created…and as each new child reaches their teenage years, there is an opportunity to embrace something new. So, while I will still hold tight to the traditions that strengthen this family, I will try hard to open my heart to something new!!

How about you?;)

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2071679/Huge-inflatable-Santa-strapped-pub-roof-high-winds-mean-ripping-tiles.html

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SPREADING Christmas Cheer!?…

Having four children sometimes has me running in all different directions, even before I start to run myself in tiny circles.

Christmas time only adds more mandatory events, more end of the season studies, more parties with volunteer opportunities, and of course, more Christmas colds SPIRIT!!

After countless end of the year projects, orchestra concerts, band concert preparation, swim tryouts, and worries of teacher gifts/donations for fall parties….. We finally made our way to the final performance of the season….the Christmas choir performance.

I dropped two to swim practice, and one to the choir door, before my youngest daughter and I made our way into the GIANT line to the auditorium, despite her insistence that it was too early to sit down.

I have always been fascinated by those parents that show up an hour early, just to stand at the front of the closed glass doors, waiting for them to open……FOR AN HOUR… JUST to get front row seats, to a show that they CLEARLY didn't need to stand in line for…

My daughter was exceptionally clingy this night, but I chalked it up to her tiredness, and general malaise/cold symptoms she had exhibited recently. Holding tightly to her, we slowly made our way into the auditorium. As I looked around, I saw countless people that I didn't necessarily know, but yet recognized clearly…

…..The mom that always waits the hour to get front row seats to see her child prodigy….The dad that picks the seat on the aisle, and is already setting up his tripod stand, to video the whole performance…and, of course, the mom that has saved an entire row of seats, with her jacket, purse, slip, tampon wrapper, and the sock from her own left foot…..just so she can look like a celebrity to her kinship, when her family reunion lets out!

Because it was about 8 rows back, but mostly because I thought it looked like it might be entertaining, I nestled us in right behind the reserved row. I found myself staring at this lady amusingly, every time she explained to a parent that she was saving the entire row… The woman had flushed cheeks, and made perfect eye contact with the floor, with each new response….

I envied her bravery, and knew I would never be as strong as this woman….

However, as she was holding strong, I was dealing with issues of my own.

My daughter began coughing constantly. I gently reminded her to cough into her sleeve or coat, as people started to stare at us, annoyed that we were in such close proximity.

My daughter was pleading for me to let her watch videos on my phone. I was reminding her of how many germs were on her hands, as I watched the room fill to capacity, leaving mostly standing room only.

My daughter was showing me how clean her hands were, still begging me to play on my phone. I ignored her and watched as the woman in front of me turned another group of two away, from her row of ten saved.

My daughter was coughing on the leaning lady beside us, as I began to hear the Christmas commotion erupting in front of us. I ignored the coughing as I was preparing to witness the kind of Christmas cheer that has become more and more prevalent!!!

“Ma'am! You cannot save a whole row of seats”!!

The man loudly berated my brave neighbor, while stealing the seats she had worked so hard to obtain! She gruffly asked for her jacket back, and moved her sock down a seat, deciding not to fight back. She sat down, looking embarrased and defeated, but she still had six more seats… Who would she give them to?

I found myself wondering just where was the Christmas spirit…the love…the joy we should all be sharing this season?!

I almost had forgotten about my sick child….

As I reached to feel her newly hot forehead, the show had started. The guests of the lady in front of me had still not shown, but no one threatened her further. My daughter was coughing harder, becoming more clingy, and was desperately trying to make a nest in her seat…my seat….and the seat of the lady next to us.

I attempted to take a picture of my son on stage, by stretching one arm around my daughters limp neck, and while patting her with the other, but it was to no avail! Even though I was pleased to be able to maintain my balance and dexterity, he was hidden behind the two girls on either side of him! Still, the music was angelic, and I got lost in the moment…until…

…My daughter was hacking again! This time she was proudly showing me the blood clot she retrieved from her nose when she last wiped it…Grimacing, and not making eye contact with the lady next to me, I gestured for her to wipe it on her coat. Then, I motioned for her to lay her head on my lap. Wadding her coat for a pillow, she carefully pushed the blood clot to the center portion of her coat, and made sure I noted that she was not placing it directly on my lap…. She was a true cherub!!!

Her small gesture made me begin to feel that Christmas spirit again. Three songs later, my son was done singing. Only 14 more songs of watching other people kids were yet to come. Only 14 more songs to hear my daughter's partially covered cough, and only 14 more songs to get leering looks from the people around me….

Just when I thought I could take not another leer, The Lord Jesus showed his face in the form of a human Christmas spirit!! The germ infested lady next to us finally leaned towards us for the first time, with a slight GRIN and a hand full of mint condition goodies and said…..

“Can I PLEASE give your daughter a cough drop”!

……Tis the season….:)

 

The other reason to go so early

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SUCKING in SHIGELLOSIS

YOUNG CHILDREN are continuing to be placed at risk, as the rise in Shiggellosis cases are soaring in the metro area. As the temperatures start to rise, and the thick humidity fills the air in the Midwest states, public swimming pools become the “place to be”, for many families trying to cool down and entertain their children.

Public pools, waterparks, lakes, and rivers…..All bodies of water containing a multitude of bacteria, for each of us to innocently swallow, just prior to getting a plague that leaves us vomitting, cramping, sitting on toilets for endless hours, and finally leading to the feelilng that we are on deaths doorstep…. Yet, we continue to go back, because the fun ALWAYS outweighs the Shiggellosis.

The newscasts and heath advisers constantly urge us all to stay home if we have shigellosis, but I think that sometimes we arent aware that we are carrying it. This leads to us accidentally leaking these digestive juices, with each swim stroke we take, causing us to spread this disease, the minute one person giggles, and inhales the very contaminated water, that just escaped our unknowingly weak sphincters.

As parents, we all have a story that we keep to ourselves, because we know we have helped contribute to the spread of this disease….at least as accomplices. We have all had an episode in which our toddler has had visible stool coming out the tops and sides of their swimming diaper, at a theme park or local public pool. However, even if it appears to be Shigellosis on first glance, our pride keeps us from telling a soul. Instead, we try to cover them up with our bodies and towels, praying to GOD that no one else noticed, and we just let the Shigellosis slowly make its way to the next childs mouth, esophagus, and then contaminate the rest of their digestive systems, leading to the same epidemic, that we are all gasping about right now!! We never even look back….we simply block it from our minds.

I for one, have never been a lover of the public pool, and not just because of Shigellosis. Since I have had kids, other than an occasional water/theme park, we have never gone to a public pool. This is due mainly in part to having our own pool, and secondly because the thought of those pools scare the Shigellosis out of me. However, sometimes I can be swayed.

Recently, my children started to beg me to go to a particular city pool. They had heard about it before, and were completely lured in by the desire to ride that giant water slide, that was advertised with the park. Finally, I gave in. However, upon going, I immediately remembered why I loathe these pools so much!!

As we made our way in, my childrens eyes were as big as saucers with excitement, and I outwardly moaned in disgust. There were no chairs to be had, because it was based on a first come first serve basis. So, I nestled myself on a towel in the middle of the ant infested park grass. My kids could have cared less, as they quickly unloaded their things beside me, and made their way to that slide, with a quick “See ya mama”!

I rarely saw them again, even though I was looking for them. Lucky for me, the pool was filled to capacity, and there was a line to get in…There was no way for me to locate my child, without having to get in there myself…which was NEVER happening. Instead, I layed there on my towel taking in my view. My view just happened to consist of a hugely obese man, who was sitting directly in front of me. So much of his crack was showing that I felt certain I could see a part of his ball sack….but there was so much hair that I wasnt sure.

After I looked at it long enough that I felt sure I had set a Guiness World Record, I finally dozed off. I figured that at least one of my four lost children would alert me if there was a problem…..

I awoke to excitement, and chatter amongst me. All four of my kids were smiling and talking over me to get their story out. I finally looked up to see the source of their amusement. The channel 13 news team was here, at the very pool we were visiting!! I smirked as I asked if they got on the news….

They laughed and pointed at each other, telling me what dorky thing each of them had done to make their way on the news. Then, my son became antsy, saying we had to go home and watch the news NOW!! I laughed, and assured him we would find his “claim to fame” piece.

Out of curiosity, as we were leaving, I asked them what the news story was about. Excitedly, my son told me it was about diarrhea and the spread of disease in public pools!!…..He was the one who was smiling and waving to the camera as it was being filmed.

I should have been nice, but its not in my nature. I have not stopped razzing them since. Today, I looked that video up, and wondered if my son had fecal matter in his teeth as he waved to the camera. He was worried at this point, as I pushed the play button. However, other than a tiny dot in the background (that one of them swears is them), my children did not make the news feed.

Im not sure, after all my verbal torture, whether they were happy or sad about not making the news. However, two things are for sure…. I would have been proud of them no matter what (Even if they get shegellosis)…..AND….they will never talk me into this madness again!!!!

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Another Birthday Poem For a Little Birthday Diva….



I guess getting older was part of your fate…

Yesterday you were two, and today you are eight!!

I don't know where the time went…how it happened so fast!

What seems so current and new, is really just a blur from the past!!

 

There was a moment when it was just me and a little you…

We would picnic and nap, and you even cuddled with me too.

You would fall behind, and make poor attempts at catching up,

but still burrow your little hand in mine, while holding that tiny sippy cup!!

 

 

Being the baby of the family is a role you have always played well.

There isnt a person in the world who wouldnt be able to tell!

The change in the pitch of your voice, gets you whatever you desire,

and when youve done something wrong, you call the other person the liar!!

 

You're cute and youre spunky, and have a style of your own.

You're dramatic, annoying, and I cant even imagine you with a phone!!

You throw serious tantrums…some bigger than lve ever before seen..

Im not ready to even consider your life as a teen!!

 

Though youre funny and witty, you create drama in both of our lives.

Sometimes rather than dealing with you, Id like to stand amidst 10 bee hives!!

You cry, and yell, and refuse to do most anything that we ask,

and you make me consider before dark, to take a sip from my flask…

 

You need so many things including bows, glitter, dresses, and high heels.

Today you reminded me that “Beauty is pain”, as though you know how that feels.

I often wonder what youre life would have been like, if we werent blessed with your presence.

I dont see how you could have survived, while living the life of a peasant….


As crazy as you make me, it is abundantly clear,

that you are smarter than all of us, my dear…

You have us all wrapped around your tiny little finger,

and even have us convinced that you are the very best singer.

 

Today you lose the car seat, yet another rite of passage..

I think staying one step ahead of you, may be to my advantage.

We spend most of our similar lives, butting heads with each other,

but I wouldnt be able to bear the thought of never being your mother.

 

I Love YOU my baby girl!!

 

Happy Birthday!!

 

Love Mama T



 

 

 

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Uncovering the Calm in the Chaos

The flavor was bursting in my mouth, though I was certain it was the idea surrounding the food, not the food itself. It tasted earthy, as though I could almost taste the soil upon my tongue, yet it was a taste so wonderful, that it left me smiling from somewhere deep down in my soul.

Now that the spring time has arrived, and is in full force, our busy lives have just doubled. With four kids, we stay pretty busy most of the time anyway, but the spring just seems to bring about more chaos. The only great perk to this increase in busywork is that with the increase in sunshine…comes more energy to conquer these things.

We have to worry about end of the year partys, graduations for every grade, and for most parents, this is a time when every teacher assigns the biggest end of year project, that no one has time to do. Our children are figety, and ready to be done with school…..AND what that means for the children in this particular home, is that I get more phone calls home from the principal.

If thats not enough, the spring sporting events start, leaving us traveling from one sport to the other, with lawn chairs, winter coats, tank tops, water bottles, coffee mugs, sunglasses, gloves, umbrellas, fancy jade HUNTER rainboots, and a small flask filled with cheap liquor, to get us through the day. There is simply no way to be ready for the weather this time of year.

Then, after we fit all that in, we still have to clean up our yards, open our pools, plan our summer vacations, and still find time to grocery shop, pay bills, cook dinner, clean the house, get homework done, and hope that all of our children will survive the season, without having to unleash the wrath of our tightly wound, stressed bodies, while keeping a smile on our faces.

Our weekend was busy as usual. We had birthday slumber parties, gifts to buy for slumber parties, and bags to pack. We had people spending the night, leaving the dreaded question “Are we allowed to drink wine or arent we”! Saturday, the kids had a 5k to run for their school, and we immediately followed that up with my sons baseball game. After freezing our asses off there, my mom and I vowed to drag our old and tired bodies to shop at the Dress barn. She had daisy dollars burning a hole in her pocket, and we needed dresses for our upcoming graduation parties, and other summer gala's.

Today, we tried to tidy up, for the upcoming week. We needed to mow, pull weeds, pot plants, and still had to arrange to take our overnight guest home. In the middle of the day, I had to take my son to the entire opposite side of town for his last Choir performance of the season. They had to be there 3 hours early, and because I wasnt willing to waste my day away, waiting for it to start, I drove home in between. That meant I instead, I wasted two hours driving in the car. Brilliant!!

We finally got home around six, and then dinner and school projects still prevailed.

The thing is, in todays day and age, our lives revolve around our children. They have to be given the best of every opportunity, or we feel like we are not doing our jobs. Often, I find this whole idea absurd, and refuse to live my life, basing it on what practice or game we have to get to….Life is more than all of that!!

Yet, my actions speak louder than words…..

As I listened to the end of my sons concert, the conductor gave a small speech before the last song. He was informing us all about the importance of camps for our kids. Of course they had one to offer, which was astronomically priced. This made me think about all of the people that I know, that spare no expense to send their kids to camp. Though I have considered sending one of my children a time or two, I never thought it would be worth the money for the time spent!! They dont even get to stay the night at any of these camps…..and many of them encourage me to stay and watch my childs growth in the community!!

How exactly does this benefit me???

Well, the other day, while visiting the inner city with some of my friends, we stopped at the public library. Not to get books, but to utilize their bathroom. While waiting in line, we noticed that there was a flyer for a summer camp for kids. They had to be 11, but the entire 6 week camp, was only $30!!!

Immediately we giggled, knowing this was probably a camp to question. Many people pay 15 to 20 dollars a day for childcare…..Was this a dream come true?! It certainly seemed like it had a lot to offer! They just must not have a lot of overhead costs right? Well, I havent ruled it out entirely, as three of my children will be over 11 soon… For a mere $60, my kids could get the camp they've always thought they dreamed of, for the ENTIRE summer!!

Regardless of whether the DREAM camp happens or not, it is clear that I too, cater to my childrens needs and desires. Despite that, each of us got something accomplished that we wanted to do this weekend, and now it was time to relax a minute before bed…..

When we got home from the concert, the rest of my family had already eaten without us. There were two plates left to the side, for my son and I to heat up, and we sat down to eat together. In our periphery, we noticed a plate of fresh vegetables, and a strainer that held lettuce. It was a type of lettuce that we dont often eat. Right about the time that we were going to get it, my other children busted through the door, excited to see if we had eaten the lettuce from our very own garden!! The excitement on their face was enough to make me smile. As I ate the earthy foliage, it gave me a little nostalgia for the simpler things in life. For no other reason, except that we each played a role in what we were eating, it was the best I had ever tasted…. and I knew to them it was too.

I felt grateful to have found a bit of spring calm, in the midst of all of the chaos…..

 

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Laughter Therapy

WE all three turned our heads in unison, and all of our stress, all of our anxiety, and all of our frustrations turned to laugher!

Each of us has our own set of stressors that we deal with on a daily basis, and some days seem more packed with stuff than others. I am no different in regards to that. Dont get me wrong, I do find plenty of time to play when the kids are at school, but other days, I have to fit in the things that I neglected on those days.

Today I had a lot to fit in. I was determined to go to the gym, since I had done little in the form of exercise, since the mini marathon, 2 weeks ago. I had to go to the grocery store, because our cabinets were completely empty, and I really needed to clean my house badly. I needed to do about 4 loads of laundry, have dinner made shortly after the kids got home, and I could have desperately used a nap.

Before I left for any of these tasks, my buddy called asking me to move some of the last of her things into her new apartment. Even knowing I had so much to do, I told myself that I could clean this house any day…and it will still look the same in minutes. She needed my help.

I threw a load of laundry in, I made it to the gym, and I bought groceries and put them away by noon. I didnt have time to shower, before I was off to assist my friend, and I admit I smelled of a mixture of rain, urine, and a hint of paprika. Still, we stayed completely on task and used our complete 2 hour timeframe wisely. As a matter of fact, we finished right in time for me to leave, still leaving it questionable as to whether I would make it in time to pick up my kids.

Feeling rushed, unclean, and in a frenzy, I quickly gathered my children and headed home to start dinner. Tonight, 3 of our children had events that started around the same time. Usually, its 3 childrens events, divided by two parents, but today it was 3 childrens events and me. Luckily, due to rain, one event was cancelled immediately after school. That left two…

Dinner finished in just enough time for me to load the boys in the car to head on our way. My plan was to drop one off at his game early, then turn around and drive my other son to his practice 45 minutes away…then come back to the game. However, I was feeling nervous because the sky was dark. I was worried that the game would be cancelled, I would be nowhere near him, and I would be the horrible mother that left her child behind, with no umbrella!!

Just prior to reaching the ball field, the game was thankfully called off….Now there was only one.

However, we were now traveling on a road that was completely out of the way. It took us what seemed like forever to make our way to the highway, and I was growing very frustrated. As I traveled down the ramp to the highway, I noticed that the traffic was at a stand still. I could have cried tears at this point, though I felt silly for thinking this way.

We were moving so slowly, that is was becoming aparent that we werent even going to make it to the last event on time. I hate sitting in traffic, especially when its 5:00 and when I didnt have time to get gas! We snail paced it along, randomly watching ambulances and road side assistants trying to make their way through gridlock traffic. I tried desperately not to panic about the gas, or simply flip out, due to the drama that seemed to be closing in around me. The boys were quiet for the most part, except for a random comment that alerted me to the fact we were going to be late.

I was trying to get into the left lane, but I knew that as soon as I did, my lane would start moving. Finally, when I couldnt take it another minute, I veered my car into the left lane, feeling good about my decision. One minute later, we saw the holdup….

WE all three turned our heads in unison, and all of our stress, all of our anxiety, and all of our frustrations turned to laughter. Beside us were vehicles with flashing lights, following behind a white deteriorated mini van. Her windows were down, her front tire was flat, and she was leaning as far up as she could in her seat, chain smoking cigarettes, while driving as slow as she could on a bent rim. Every single person that passed her, watched her, knowing this was keeping them from their event.

My boys and I immediately started laughing. One of my sons said, “WHAT was that”? I laughed and said it was probably his biological mother. Clearly, despite each and every one of our own personal lifestyles, that add all the ingredients to create this dysfunctional family we live in, we are on a level to joke about the nature of such things…and we just kept giggling. We werent really laughing at the lady herself, but the situation….

I have no idea why the roadside people allowed for this woman to block an entire lane of traffic, during rush hour, while she went 3 MPH. I dont know why they didnt just fix her tire. I dont know for sure why the ambulance was on its way. I dont know why as soon as we passed her, the entire highway was clear, and I dont know why she didnt save her cigarettes for when she was at the side of the road, waiting for her tire to be fixed. I do know that this situation changed a stressful mama into a laid back one. It jolted me back to reality! So what if we had to sit in a little traffic?!… We didnt have any problems, in comparison to this poor lady!

That is…..Unless we ran out of gas…

I decided in the whole scheme of things, Id rather have my own stressors than anyone elses!!

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